I seem to have found my creative muse for the season. Unfortunately, it has not yet been parlayed into the creation of my final paper. In order to loosen the gears in my head and stop the distractions, I have decided to let loose a new batch of baby clothing design options, especially geared towards Christmas in my family. Again, if anyone out there would like to create one of these for an actual baby, please do so. Just be sure to send me a picture. Enjoy.
1. I am a Happy Christmas Tree
This is the most obvious of my designs. It keeps babies warm AND it has cool flashy lights so you can find your baby quickly should they wander off in the department store.
2. Circle of Pine
Again, this is another obvious choice. Honestly, I am very surprised that no one has thought of this before! People love wreaths. People love babies. Wreath + Baby = Ultra Holiday Happy Cheer Spreading Machine.
3. Purely Ornamental
Now we're starting to get a little more creative while still staying close to basics. What is more classic than a shiny red ornament and a silver tinsel boa?
4. Sweets for the Sweet
Personally, I am not a huge candy cane fan, but they certainly do put people into a holiday mood. As an added bonus, the crook of the candy cane can be used as a handle to restrain or pick up your little minty mayhem maker.
5. Do NOT Re-Gift!
Personally, I have never eaten fruitcake, nor do I have any intention of doing so. The same goes for babies. Does that make this a perfect pairing? Perhaps.
6. Shake It Up Baby!
Let's just face it, snow globes are awesome. There is something so calming about them, and what child couldn't stand a little calming action? In case you couldn't tell, the baby's head is NOT in the water.
7. Just a Little Lefse
You might need to be an American of Scandinavian descent to understand this one, but for my family, nothing says holidays like fighting over the plate of lefse. For the uneducated, it is a tortilla-like flatbread made with potatoes and cooked on a special lefse griddle using a special lefse turning stick. My favorite preparation is with butter and sugar, all rolled up (usually without a baby in the middle).
8. Eat at Your Own Risk
If you want to know more about lutefisk, Google it. I can't say too much more about it without triggering my gag reflex, but it remains a popular holiday item in these parts. Please note that the baby's headgear represents the enormous pat of butter that would be necessary to make the lutefisk even 1% edible.
9. Family Traditionwear
This one may be a bit out there, but it is absolutely necessary for me to include it. Fattigman cookies are a family tradition in my household, and my father claims to have eaten more fattignman in his lifetime than anyone else now living. He makes that qualification because there are probably some people now deceased who could have competed with him. But a lifetime of eating pounds of these fried delights has earned him certain bragging rights.
This concludes my fashion show for now. I hope you enjoyed it and are feeling inspired. If not to go out and make one of these fine creations, then just to get yourself in a holiday mood. And maybe make me some cookies or lefse. No lutefisk please.
There were a couple of extra fashions that I didn't finish in time for the first version. Please excuse my tardiness.
10. Let There Be Light
Christmas lights are nice. They enable otherwise mild-mannered homeowners to jazz up their house exteriors and make passersby think that they are cool. Some people make a competition out of it, but in the end, it's all in good fun, right?
11. The First Day of Christmas
The title of this design should make it obvious what I am trying to portray. However, if you are still unsure, here is a hint: it is NOT the Jolly Green Giant!!!